We've done one radio show before - live on Delta FM, a small radio station based in Bordon. But this is the big time. Eagle FM! with listening figures well into double figures. Except we're not live this time, we're recording one tune and a quick interview to go out this Sunday at 9.30pm - so turn that dial to 96.4 FM pop pickers .... Brassneck will be coming in your ears this very weekend!
So Sid, Mark, Kat and I arrive 5 minutes early outside of the palatial Eagle FM residence in a 1960s shopping block above TGI Fridays in Guildford. Kat has got the sniffles - obviously not nearly as bad as the near death experience I had last week with man flu - but she is clearly suffiering from copious amounts of snot in her head. She won't be singing tonight so we'll be doing "Sensitive but a bit of a 'rong 'un" which I'll be singing and Neil will be doing backing vox on. We stand outside while Sid has a fag. Kat isn't smoking - clearly she is more ill than we first feared. We upgrade her condition from 'the sniffles' to 'a bit of a cold'.
We get let into the Eagle offices and ascend the copious amount of stairs - decorated with the most lurid pink and purple paint you could imagine - and arrive at the reception area where we see signed pictures of Anastasia! and some other people I don't recognise. But Anastasia! Wow. We're almost overwhelmed for a moment. We do, however, manage to regain our composure in time to be met by the very nice Luke who says they're just preparing the studio and will be ready in 5 minutes. Neil 'Knuckles' Magoo arrives shortly after - he managed to locate the car park thats on the roof. On the roof! How does that work?
10 minutes later Luke and his buddy Jon appear to tell us they'll be ready for us in 5 minutes. It appears that the studio has been double booked and we'll have to wait a little longer. No problem. He gets us a glass of water - not very rock'n'roll we admit, but we are thirsty.
10 minutes later Luke and his buddy Jon appear to tell us they'll be ready for us in 5 minutes. Not a problem.
We read the literature on show in the reception area. Nigel Havers is starring in Aladdin in Guildford this winter. We can barely contain our excitement. Neil regales us with his John Peel impression. Its actually very good.
10 minutes later Luke and his buddy Jon appear to tell us they'll be ready for us in 5 minutes.
15 minutes later we are in the Studio!
We run through 'Sensitive.....'. It goes really well - probably the best we have played it acoustically - get in! We hear the playback ...... it sounds awful! The levels are all over the place. We shufle round to different parts of the room, move the mics and do it again. Its better but still not quite right. A bit more shuffling and we get the levels right. Its sounds pretty good.
We then run through a standard format interview - 'What are your influences?' 'How did you meet?' 'Whats the best gig you've done so far?' .... etc. It's a little stilted at first but after a couple of minutes we get into our stride and start rippping the piss out of each other. Normal service has resumed. I won't bore you with the details of it - you can listen to it this very Sunday at 9.30pm.
We say our farewells to Luke and Jon and, once outside, decide that we'll have to go for a pint. Sid reckons he knows a proper little pub round the corner. We take a left off the main street and ascend some steps up a dark, narrow Victorian alleyway. Its dark ....... very dark ..... the fog descends. We continue on through the cemetery. Yes, you read that right... through the cemetery, until we arrive at the Slaughtered Lamb Public Inn. We open the creaky door. There are a few locals in. They stop their conversation and silently watch as we enter. All we hear is the crackle of the open fire. Are you sure this is the right place Sid?
We order some drinks at the bar. We are clearly of some interest to the locals. One makes friends with Mark. I can't really make out what he is saying, but I do know he is standing up straight. I only know this because he is drooling out of both sides of his mouth. It's all gone a bit 'Deliverence' now. Upon realising we are in a band, the landlady asks for our details so they can book us. Sid wearily gives his details, safe in the knowledge we will never hear anything about it again. 'You never do' says Sid.
We retire to a quiet corner and proceed to rip the piss out of each other for the next hour or so. Its the Brassneck way.
We decide to call it a night. Its been an interesting one. Something tells me, however, we will be back here in the future.
I drop Sid off back at his gaff. He shows me the massive vomit puddle by the bus stop outside his flat. It was left there by our mate Al when we stopped by here the other night. Its a very impressive amount of vomit. Especially considering its been there for 3 days.
Its been that kind of night.
Eagle FM 96.4, Sunday 12th October 9.30pm. Or did I already mention that.
Laters innit,
Ben
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